How does child custody work, and how do courts decide?

Legal vs. physical custody, joint vs. sole

Custody has two parts, and each can be shared by both parents or held by one. California's Family Code gives clear definitions:

• Legal custody. The right and responsibility to make decisions about the child's health, education and welfare. With joint legal custody both parents share it; with sole legal custody one parent has it.Cal. Fam. Code §§ 3003, 3006
• Physical custody. Where the child lives. With joint physical custody each parent has significant periods with the child; with sole physical custody the child lives with one parent, and the court can order visitation, also called parenting time, for the other.Cal. Fam. Code §§ 3004, 3007
• Joint does not have to mean 50/50. In Texas, parents named joint managing conservators share decision-making, but that does not necessarily mean their time with the child is split evenly.Texas State Law Library
• Neither parent starts ahead. In Texas, mothers and fathers have the same rights under the law. In New York, neither parent has an automatic right to custody.Texas State Law Library · N.Y. Dom. Rel. Law § 240(1)(a)

How judges decide: the best interests of the child

Every state, the District of Columbia and the US territories have laws describing the factors judges must consider so that custody decisions serve the child's best interests. Most states do not define the phrase itself; the judge looks at the particular child and family. California's courts list what the judge considers there:

• The child's age and health.
• The emotional ties between each parent and the child.
• The child's ties to school, home and community.
• Each parent's ability to care for the child.
• Any history of family violence.
• Regular, ongoing substance abuse by either parent.

• Texas. The child's best interest is always the court's primary consideration. The law presumes that naming both parents joint managing conservators is in the child's best interest, but a history of family violence between the parents removes that presumption.Tex. Fam. Code §§ 153.002, 153.131
• Florida. The court starts from a presumption that equal time-sharing is in the child's best interests, which a parent can rebut by proving otherwise. Parental responsibility is shared unless sharing would be detrimental to the child, for example because of domestic violence.Fla. Stat. § 61.13(2)(c)
• New York. The court decides as justice requires, with regard to the best interests of the child. When a parent's sworn claim of domestic violence is proven, the court must consider its effect on the child's best interests.N.Y. Dom. Rel. Law § 240(1)(a)

Parenting plans: putting it in writing

A parenting plan sets out how you will share the children's care. California's courts say it should describe how to care for the children, where they will live and when they will see each parent. Sometimes parents can agree on a plan; other times they need the court's help.

In Florida, a parenting plan approved by the court must at least:

• Describe how the parents will share the daily tasks of raising the child.
• Set the time-sharing schedule: the time the child spends with each parent.
• Say who is responsible for health care, for school matters, including the address used for school registration, and for other activities.
• Describe how the parents will communicate with the child.
• Name the places where the child is handed over, unless the parents agree otherwise in writing.

Texas has a standard possession order, a default schedule that the law presumes gives a parent reasonable minimum time with the child and is in the child's best interest. If work schedules or other circumstances make it unworkable, the court orders a schedule as close to it as possible.

Custody mediation: often the first step

In mediation, a neutral person meets with both parents and helps you work out a plan you can both accept. Whether you must try it depends on your state:

• California: required when custody is contested. The court must set a contested custody or visitation issue for mediation, and you go before you see the judge. Some courts call it child custody recommending counseling.Cal. Fam. Code § 3170(a) · California Courts
• Florida: where a family mediation program exists. In those circuits, once the court finds a dispute, it must refer custody, visitation and other parental responsibility issues to mediation.Fla. Stat. § 44.102(2)(c)
• Texas: by agreement or by the court. The court can refer a custody case to mediation on the parents' written agreement or on its own. A mediated agreement that meets the law's requirements is binding, so read it carefully before you sign.Tex. Fam. Code § 153.0071(c)-(e)

Changing a custody order

A custody order is not necessarily the last word: the court can change it later. To get a judge to change it, you usually have to show that something important has changed and that the new order would be better for the child:

• California: file a Request for Order (form FL-300) in your existing case and explain what has changed since the last order. You go to mediation or child custody recommending counseling before you see the judge.
• Texas: the court can change the order if it is in the child's best interest and circumstances have materially and substantially changed, among other grounds. Asking within a year of the order to change who decides where the child lives requires a sworn affidavit with specific facts.
• Florida: a parenting plan or time-sharing schedule can't be changed without a substantial and material change in circumstances and a finding that the change is in the child's best interests.

Moving away with your child

A move can make the current schedule impossible, so states have rules for it. Check your own order first: orders often say what a parent must do before moving, for example give the other parent written notice 45 days ahead.

• California. A parent with custody may change the child's residence, but the court can stop a move that would harm the child's rights or welfare. Under a permanent order, a parent with sole physical custody is usually allowed to move unless the other parent shows harm, while a parent with joint physical custody must show the move is in the child's best interest.Cal. Fam. Code § 7501 · California Courts
• Florida. A move of 50 miles or more for at least 60 days in a row is a relocation. It needs the written agreement of the other parent and anyone else with time-sharing. Without that, you must file a sworn petition to relocate and serve it on them. If no one objects in time, the move is presumed to be in the child's best interest.Fla. Stat. § 61.13001

California's courts note that you don't have to hire a lawyer for your whole case: you can talk to a lawyer just about a move-away situation.

When parents live in different states: the UCCJEA

A uniform law, the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA), decides which state's court can make or change a custody order. It does not set the rules for who gets custody; it decides where the case belongs. California, Texas, Florida and New York all use it.

• The home state comes first. Usually the child's home state decides: where the child lived with a parent for at least 6 months in a row just before the case was filed. For a baby under 6 months, it is the state where the child has lived since birth.Tex. Fam. Code §§ 152.102(7), 152.201 · Fla. Stat. §§ 61.503, 61.514 · N.Y. Dom. Rel. Law § 76
• The state that made the order generally keeps it. A court that made a custody order keeps the power over it until a court finds that the child and the parents no longer have a significant connection to that state, or that none of them lives there anymore.Tex. Fam. Code § 152.202
• Orders travel with you. State courts must enforce valid custody and visitation orders made in other states. You can register an out-of-state order in your new state so its courts can enforce it.OJJDP: The UCCJEA · Tex. Fam. Code § 152.305
• Emergencies. A court in the state where the child is present can act temporarily in an emergency, for example to protect a child who is threatened with mistreatment or abuse.Tex. Fam. Code § 152.204

Do I need a child custody lawyer?

Not always. Courts publish custody forms and run self-help centers for parents without a lawyer, and mediation can help you reach an agreement. California's courts say every superior court has free legal help in family law, whatever your income, though any lawyer you speak with there is not your lawyer.

Talk to a child custody lawyer or a legal aid office if there is family violence or abuse, the other parent has a lawyer, one of you plans to move far away, the parents live in different states or countries, or you are asked to sign an agreement that would be binding.

Common questions

Official sources

1. Child Welfare Information Gateway (HHS): Determining the best interests of the child (state statutes, current through September 2023) childwelfare.gov
2. California Courts Self-Help Guide: What to know about child custody and parenting time courts.ca.gov
3. California Courts Self-Help Guide: What you can file to ask for a custody order courts.ca.gov
4. California Courts Self-Help Guide: What to expect from family court mediation courts.ca.gov
5. California Courts Self-Help Guide: Ask for or change a custody and parenting time order courts.ca.gov
6. California Courts Self-Help Guide: Relocating (moving away) with your child courts.ca.gov
7. California Courts Self-Help Guide: Court-based self-help services courts.ca.gov
8. California Courts Self-Help Guide: Divorce forms, including the UCCJEA declaration (form FL-105) courts.ca.gov
9. California Family Code §§ 3003-3007: joint and sole legal and physical custody (definitions) leginfo.legislature.ca.gov
10. California Family Code § 3170: mediation of contested custody and visitation leginfo.legislature.ca.gov
11. California Family Code § 7501: a parent's right to change the child's residence leginfo.legislature.ca.gov
12. Texas State Law Library: Child custody and support, general information sll.texas.gov
13. Texas State Law Library: Custody and visitation (possession orders, child's preference, out-of-state orders) sll.texas.gov
14. Texas Family Code, Chapter 153: conservatorship, possession and access (§§ 153.002, 153.0071, 153.009, 153.131, 153.252) legis.texas.gov
15. Texas Family Code, Chapter 156: modification (§§ 156.101, 156.102) legis.texas.gov
16. Texas Family Code, Chapter 152: Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act legis.texas.gov
17. Florida Statutes § 61.13 (2026): parenting plans, time-sharing and best interests flsenate.gov
18. Florida Statutes § 61.13001 (2026): parental relocation with a child flsenate.gov
19. Florida Statutes § 44.102 (2026): court-ordered mediation flsenate.gov
20. Florida Statutes § 61.503 (2026): UCCJEA definitions, home state flsenate.gov
21. Florida Statutes § 61.514 (2026): initial child custody jurisdiction flsenate.gov
22. New York Domestic Relations Law § 240: custody and the best interests of the child nysenate.gov
23. New York Domestic Relations Law § 76: initial child custody jurisdiction (Article 5-A, UCCJEA) nysenate.gov
24. U.S. Department of Justice, OJJDP: The Uniform Child-Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (Bulletin, 2001, PDF) ojp.gov
25. Child Welfare Information Gateway (HHS): How to report child abuse and neglect childwelfare.gov
26. Child Welfare Information Gateway (HHS): Find help with a personal situation (domestic violence hotline) childwelfare.gov

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